Nauseous, disgusted, Dakota Fanninged, impressed. These are all emotions I felt while watching Oprah Winfrey's Tom Cruise Ass-Kiss-A-Thon called "25 years of Tom Cruise". Watching past cast-mates and collaborators like Dustin Hoffman (who was actually more retarded in the shout out than he was in Rain Man) to Steven Speilberg to oh so creepy and 10 going on 75 Dakota Fanning sharing and telling glorious, flowery memories of their days spent working with Mr. Cruise deeply affected me. I was nauseous because it was disgusting, I was then Fanninged by Dakota Fanning and overall I was impressed that Oprah Winfrey would take time out of her busy schedule of giving things away to audience members to honor such an American Icon and level 4 Scientologist such as Tom Cruise. Not only did Mr. Cruise do a KILLER Jack Nicholson impression... he didn't jump on any couches! Cruise just sort of sat there with his chiseled features, smiling and possibly levitating audience members off-camera with his mind, while other celebrities talked about how "great" and "awesome" he is and was and would be to work with. I retract my notion that Oprah stopped doing what she does five days a week at Harpo Studios, each audience member received a Tom Cruise DVD box set (sick!) and a special edition of "Risky Business" (heyooo!). I can't wait till the 50th anniversary.
2 comments:
Fanninged is such a powerful emotion. I saw her recently on some commercial by the AARP (wtf?) encouraging me to get involved in the political process. She'll probably grow up to be Secretary of State.
I read somewhere that Oprah was provided with a set of personalized moccasins/slippers when she arrived at the Cruise home. Truth?
I am not sure of the validity of the personalized slippers. What I am sure of is that she received an autographed first edition of "Battlefield Earth" signed by Cruise, though. L. Ron is in Xanadu in a pod, I believe.
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