Everyday Struggle

Extreme Sheep Herding

I'm not sure if this is real, but if it is, it's amazing.

majestic creatures welcome spring

Walking home yesterday from work, I noticed an unsettling number of birds. Specifically, robins. Everywhere. Literally scores of robins. I estimated about fifty, and that was only on the ground-- some were hiding in trees, others waiting patiently on telephone wires. It was kind of like dying and going to bird-heaven, where all the robins had died and became little angelic beacons of spring and bird-heaven looked just like Albion Avenue.

The Life of Mammals

I love David Attenborough. He was the creator of "Planet Earth," which was absolutely beautiful, and I've started exploring his earlier work. Right now, I'm obsessed with the series "The Life of Mammals." Attenborough leads the viewer from the most primative of mammals all the way up to human beings. Even if you were the type of kid who was obsessed with all things animals, you'll still learn something new. Much of Attenborough's work is available for instant view on Netflix.

I shall pet you now

Fancy Fluffy Lady

I know this isn't really a forum for personal news ... but I have a new cat. Her name is Penelope.

She is a total babe.

She appreciates belly rubs.

and enjoys games that simulate the action and intensity of "the kill."

Damien Hirst has created a pickled unicorn

First off, I kind of wish I could afford to buy something at this auction, specifically the unicorn.
Secondly, I definitely recommend seeing Hirst's preserved tiger shark (titled "The Physical Impossibility of Death in the Mind of Someone Living")the next time you're in the MET.

Cat Fight

Two fat 'n spoiled cats locked in an epic battle for the LazyBoy.

Holy Alaska!

Zoo Babies

Occasionally, boston.com updates their photo gallery of zoo babies; it always makes me smile.

Moose + Sprinklers = Glorious Awkward Mammal Fun!

Oodles of sprinkler fun:

That time Jess tried to get a free cat from Sunnyside, Queens

For about three weeks now, I've been maybe a little obsessed with the free pets you can get off craigslist. Up until last week, I was only emailing people who placed an ad on craigslist to get more information or photos of the pet up for adoption. Then I found this way cute, almost all-white, 8-month old kitten that was FREE and came with a litterbox, cat litter, cat food, 2 cat carriers, and toys. This cat was situated up in Sunnyside, Queens, and was up for adoption because the landlord found out this kid had a cat when he wasn't supposed to. I emailed the owner to tell him I was interested and when could I meet this kitty. The owner, one Akiva Rabinowitz, emails me back saying he's going to be out of town for a week at a wedding, so we agree to meet up the following week.

A few days later, I get a voicemail from an obnoxiously, wheedling male voice, and initially, I think someone's playing a prank on me. But then this voice says "Ya, ummm this is Akiva and ummm something bad happened to the cat." He goes on to say the cat's really messed up, he thinks a neighbor let the cat fall out of a window, he's really upset, doesn't know if she's going to make it, etc. I immediately email him back, asking about the cat's status, and yesterday he leaves another voicemail saying the cat doesn't look too good. I email him again asking for details, and Akiva answers me with this email:

"Hey Jessica, I would tell you what happened but it is a really sad and disturbing story. I would not feel that it would be acceptable for me to tell you what happened without your consent or foreknowledge that it is an upsetting story. - Akiva"

Now I just HAVE to know what the hell is going on. I give him my firm consent, and recieve yet another voicemail this afternoon saying nothing about the details but that there is some kind of "a happy ending" for the cat. "Akiva! You're such a tease!" I think to myself as I write him yet another email asking for details, updates, theories, pictures, maps, ANYTHING. And FINALLY, I get what I've been waiting for: the dirty details and the sorta happy ending.

Everyone, here is the story of poor Nadia the cat, a feline I never met, and her owner, Akiva, a person I can't really picture myself befriending because we seem to be on opposite sides of a spectrum, and yet we were all (kind of) together in this epic cat-drama:

(in a WHEEDLING VOICE)

So the story of what happened is pretty horrific, but has a relatively happy ending I guess. As we discussed, I went away for the weekend for my brother's wedding in Michigan. My one and only roommate, who is also away in Florida, made copies of our apartment keys and gave them to our mutual friend, Ben, a film student at the New School. The day after I got to Michigan, right before my brother's bachelor party, I get a call from Ben saying "I found Nadia in the basement and she is dragging her hind legs and stuff is leaking out of her anus." I have always known Ben to be the practical joker type, so I hung up on him and plugged my phone into charge. The guys and I then left the hotel for the bachelor party and when I came back at 2:30AM, I had text messages from ben saying "Fuck you" and "In case you care Nadia fell out of one of the windows" and "I had to pay 50 dollars to take her to the Veterinarian asshole and they wanted 300 dollars to do xrays so I just took her to my house." Meanwhile, Ben has owed me over 100 dollars for the past six months and not made a single attempt to pay me back. I stayed up all night feeling horrified and at 7AM I told Ben to take Nadia to an animal hospital and not just a Vet and that I would give the hospital my credit card information so she could get proper care.

About 4 hours later, a Doctor called me and told me that Nadia had broken her back on the 7th vertebrae and would likely need surgery. My brother's wedding was that night so I just asked the doctor to keep her comfortable (administer pain and sedation medication) for the day. I changed my flight to come back on the 16th rather than the 18th so I could address the situation. The vet called when I got home and told me that I had several options: I could take Nadia home, but would have to keep her confined in a cage and clean her daily because it was too painful for Nadia to clean herself. Additionally, the vet said I would have to learn how to squeeze her intestines to expel her poop and that she would always just pee in
place because there was no way she could get herself into the litter box. Well, since I am a full-time student, that option was really out of the question, as the doctor said Nadia needed someone home with her at least 8 hours daily to care for her. The second option the vet offered was to take an MRI to get more specific idea of the nerve damage so that they could operate and repair the nerve and the vertebrae. The vet said this option would not guarantee that Nadia's condition would improve and that the MRI plus the Operation would cost $6,000 (Ohhh, New York City). Being a poor college student, that option was out of the question. Finally, the only option left was euthanasia. I told the doctor to keep her comfortable and cared for for one more night and that I would come in the animal hospital the following day with a decision.

So, after I woke up on tuesday, I made my way to 55th St between 9th and 10th Ave and was placed in a room without an examination table with several boxes of Kleenex tissues. A young, male veterinarian comes in and advises that I agree to euthanize her, given my inability to constantly care for her and lack of financial means to pay for a surgery that had the potential to worsen Nadia's condition. So, bawling my eyes out he handed over an authorization form to euthanize Nadia which I signed without even looking at. Naturally the last thing this vet said to me was that "you have a balance on your account." Still bawling my eyes out, I gave the lady at the front desk my credit card and as she proceeded to print an itemized invoice of all the care they had administered I asked her nicely to just give me my credit card receipt and throw away the invoice. I bawled on the entire taxi ride back to Queens. I spent yesterday calling family members and telling them, but every time I tried to speak I would just cry.

Then, today, at about 11:00 in the morning I got a call from the hospital. My stomached turned thinking that they were calling to tell me that the euthanasia was completed and to please pick up her cremated remains. However, instead the same doctor who recommended I euthanize her says "We have not euthanized Nadia yet. Over the course of her stay at the hospital, several staff members and a doctor had become quite fond of Nadia." He asked me if I would rescind the euthanasia authorization and instead adopt Nadia over to the hospital and that they would care for her. It was quite literally the happiest moment of my life in years. They faxed me a form and I filled out all the information and faxed it back. Overall, her treatment cost $1,860, but the fact that she was accepted by the most loving and caring environment possible made the cost immaterial. The only sad part is I no longer have the right to see her or get information about her condition. Luckily, she is in the best place she could possibly be and thank god it is not "kitty heaven."

Akiva Rabinowitz.

Topics of Discussion

I just spent an hour or so talking with my grandfather in the driveway. Topics of conversation included but were not limited to:


chiggers/ticks/mosquitoes and all manner of insidious pests; the automatic weapon he got to fire at a family reunion; FDR; a possible rabbit infestation under his shed; fond remembrances of a busty woman he saw jogging several decades ago; a 1939 Johnny Pesky rookie card; Libertarians; the elephant skin belt he wore sometime in the 1960s; dental hygienists; skipping his high school graduation to leave for Navy boot camp; rhubarb; researching local politicians on Google; the end of the world; knee injuries; turkeys; and a dog he used to own with a penchant for barking at people of Arab descent.

I'm Just Saying...

From National Geographic:

Unicorn deer found in Italy: article here

"Monkey, Monkey Monkey, Raskolnikov"

Monkey Controls Robot With Mind - article and video

Doc Ock meets Outbreak?

If movies have taught me anything - and I believe they have - it's that experimental technologies will invariably be exploited for evil.

Je suis Henri.

No Country for Little Birds

may my heart always be open to little
birds who are the secrets of living
whatever they sing is better than to know
and if men should not hear them men are old
- e.e. cummings

Inspired by these lines from e.e. cummings and fond recollections of my weekly duck feedings near my old apartment, I recently purchased a bird feeder. I picked out an inexpensive model that suction-cups to a window and was delighted by the idea that I would awake every morning to pleasant and discreetly chirping flocks of chickadees and nuthatches (the types of birds promised by the bag of seed I purchased) feeding only a few feet from my bed. Alas, this was not to be.

My plans immediately began to go awry when I discovered that the suction cup that worked so well on the side of a vitamin water display at Wal-Mart was not strong enough to hold to the window when the feeder was full of seed. Undeterred, I climbed out on the roof and hung my feeder from an overhanging tree branch and reconciled myself to putting my glasses on each morning to watch the birds. A few weeks passed with no bird sightings, only squirrels who didn't even bother to climb up to the feeder - plenty of seeds fall down to the rooftop whenever the slightest breeze blows. Finally about a week ago I received my first genuine avian visitor - a blue jay. Despite their impressive plumage, blue jays were low on my list of desired birds as they have an annoying call and are notoriously aggressive and unfriendly to smaller more melodious species. However, given my lack of birds to this point I was open to any species and even managed to overlook the fact that the blue jay - like the squirrels - ignored the feeder itself and ate directly from the rooftop.

This weekend I awoke to frantic squawking and looked out to see a largish dark brown bird trashing my feeder while two of his comrades raucously cheered him on from a nearby branch. I didn't get my glasses on fast enough to identify the birds and they flew away, leaving my feeder completely empty, seeds strewn all over the roof. I brushed off the assault as an isolated incident and refilled my feeder, optimistically telling myself that it was only a matter of time before word got out amongst the other birds about the free food. I was foolish and naive. The very next morning the overhanging tree was full of large, angry birds with dark brown bodies and blue heads who were taking turns swooping down and spilling seed from my violently rocking feeder to the waiting masses on the rooftop. I tried rapping on the glass, but they continued on undeterred. When the feeder was nearly empty they moved on, taking up residence in a treetop across the street.

I did some research at my local library and learned that I had been visited by grackles - a notoriously thuggish species of bird. Grackles are distinguished by their song which is described as "a harsh, unmusical "readle-eak," like a rusty gate" (click here to listen to a sample). The Cornell Lab of Ornithology site also lists "Cool Facts" about each species; the grackle is noted for "taking advantage of whatever food sources it can find. It will follow plows for invertebrates and mice, wade into water to catch small fish, and sometimes kill and eat other birds at bird feeders." This rather grim "cool fact" was confirmed when further research yielded this chilling video.