Yeah.

The news is awesome.

City Slicker

A mournful Amazing Grace in
Harvard Square Station,
And high heel clicks on cobble stone
Is what it means
To call this city home.

Heirloom

I.
In the grave days of small wonders,
quarried bones and headstone halves gleaned through ceiling holes,
secrets coupling with house ghosts, retrieving mementos
from closets, from bedrooms
at odd hours throughout the night

and straight into winter
and straight into morning

II.
Remember: Exposure

TV buzz, bellyaching
sans love
all the great drones of a great haunted house

our very own. Remember:
Porcelain
(shaken memories from the shelves
shattering on the grubby floors below),
cow hips in the foundation,
cats under crosses,
dead dogs gathering in sewage pools

without a God’s Eye. Remember

the downstairs piano talking
off-key
in the dread hush of something
ghastly taking shape with eyes open

I, in an upstairs twin
beside the curved wall window
gazing into stairs
in the face of time without time,
time without hands
time as endless indifference

in that unearthly moan,
an eternity of just knowing

III.
you, sleeping around in the corners,
in the corner of a room, you were sleeping
around with her, you, with and without my sister
drawing up lies and quick answers.

Then I was afraid just knowing

of my own forgotten sleepwalks,
the secrets I, too thickly harbored
like you, Brother, under woolen covers

the great dusty heirloom
banging about the crooked floorboards.

World Record Skateboard Slalom

Burger King, Body Spray

http://www.firemeetsdesire.com/

Betcha can't spray just once.

Everyone can vote!

I don't have a lot of sympathy for anyone involved in this clip. Encouraging uninformed people to loudly shout their personal/political opinions into a video camera is the moral equivalent of getting boozed-up girls with low self esteem to flash their tits on spring break.



Later that night, the self-righteous cameraman received his comeuppance (and a lesson in irony) when a crowd of folksy racists* and townie homophobes took turns sodomizing him in the alley behind Ruby Tuesdays.

Take that, universal suffrage!


*extra irony: probably the same people who made Beverly Hills Chihuahua the #1 movie in America last week

A Week Before Christmas

i.
I heard you went to church
that morning. And the rope

was it already noosed? knotted?
I didn't go to church that morning.

I stopped praying when I colored the Savior
black and blue in CCD, his heart gold,

a cold purple crown.

But you went to church early that day.
And I missed the morning.

You would miss the evening.
It will pour on Christmas.

ii.
I woke up late,
brunched at the Toast

because Harvey's was closed,
my sister and I, frustrated.

You were muttering. Perhaps
praying? You were silent.

Crying? There was silence.
I had eggs over-hard on toast.

I scraped my plate clean.
And you swung.

iii.
Your three daughters are shaking, Donna.
Last night, your eyes were closed like mine

and I saw them screaming, tearing
at their hair, their young faces crumpled,

torrents of tears.
Their fingers only fists.

It was desperate, Donna.
I turned in my sleep so many times last night.

There was nothing else I could do.
You lay in your silence

your last words held fast in a still heart.
Winter settled thickly about you.

Schlitz Alert

Word on the street/internet is that Schlitz is reintroducing its original formula. Learn more HERE.


As far as dirt cheap domestics go, I thought the Schlitz I'd been drinking was pretty ok. Nevertheless, I'm looking forward to the Original formula.

Also, Google Image searching "Schlitz" yields some quality results. It seems they were fond of incorporating ham sandwiches into their ads whenever possible.

Long Way Wrong

Long Way Wrong
For George Oppen

1

Wrong way all along.

Who could say it?

"Confess."

What is expected tends to forget
Its own expectedness

Thus it disappoints

And we forget what
The fuss about confessing
Ever meant.

2

Suggestions, limit one per complaint

"Confess now, before my temper is
Gone for good."

So.

If something lost, to be found,
Must seek presence
And foundedness
We lost already the way we sought
And backwards we must go forever.

3

"Jesus wept."

Tissue paper for under a dollar.

Have you
Your face
On currency found?

One must be mad to think such things.

"Or brilliant."

But often I hope
That as in all difficult moments,
We tread the turbulent currents of numbers
In solitude

With vigorous ease

And weep.

4

"Perfect" is more than a word.

It's a curse

Like "Man" or "Woman" or "In" and "Out"

And without a single doubt in mind
I shake.

"Too late."

For whom?

5

Difficulty continues
To be our national shadow

To beat or be beaten

Holding sway

"Pride is a sin best punished by death."

So it is.

6

Napalm precipitates
Without our knowing
Without our understanding
That "Napalm" is more than a word in a poem

It is not understanding.

"Conflict, you mean?"

Perhaps that's what I mean.

But still I hope that what we mean
Will one day be clean

Enough to hold sway

Instead of that casual grin.

Play to Win

Most of the time I find Jon Stewart and the Daily Show unamusing and obnoxious. This is not most of the time:

A Multilingual Nation

Now that we're on the topic of language, here's an article to read about multilingualism, or the lack thereof, in America.


Now for a joke:


What do you call someone who speaks four languages?
Multilingual.

What do you call someone who speaks three languages?
Trilingual.

What do you call someone who speaks two languages?
Bilingual.

What do you call someone who speaks one language?
American.

Pulp Love

Paperbacks Galore has an excellent collection of exploitation paperback covers. I recommend the "Hillbilly" and "Drug-themed" sections.

That's Hot

I think Paris Hilton is great.

See more Paris Hilton videos at Funny or Die

What the end could look like -

Holy Ground

Badassery, thy name is Peckinpah.



The ante has been upped.

Oh, Please

John McCain tells Maryland Republicans "I know how to win wars." Which ones? I'm sure we're all very grateful for Mr. McCain's service over the years but this is like Sergio Garcia saying "I know how to win majors*."


*for non golf fans, Sergio Garcia is a Spanish golfer who despite playing in many majors over the years - and acquitting himself exceptionally well in several - has never actually won one.

10 Things I Do Every Day by Ted Berrigan

wake up
smoke pot
see the cat
love my wife
think of Frank

eat lunch
make noises
sing songs
go out
dig the streets

go home for dinner
read the Post
make pee-pee
two kids
grin

read books
see my friends
get pissed-off
have a Pepsi
disappear

Hidden Treasure

Coverbrowser.com has an amazing online archive of classic comics covers - thousands of titles in horror, romance, sci-fi, superhero and beyond. I found some choice selections in House of Mystery/Secrets, Crime SuspenStories, and Pulp.

The Naked Campaign

For several months now, illustrator Steve Brodner has been creating a series of short videos that combine clever animations, live political cartooning, and thoughtful campaign analysis for the New Yorker's online only section. Each short artfully interprets a specific campaign issue or political concept; for example, with the aid of a marker board Brodner shows how an "intellectual" candidate like Barack Obama can be transformed with only a few strokes into Abraham Lincoln, Adlai Stephenson, or Woody Allen in the public eye.

Some of Brodner's shorts are a little too clever for their own good (straight talk egg-spress salad flavored with Hamas...) but usually his low-key analogies and visual interpretations of campaign issues come across as both educational and amusing. The entire series is available here at the New Yorker site.

the Coney Island Annual Mermaid Parade

We came. We went. We saw. There were boobs and tassles and tails and fins and sequins and floats and wigs and body paint and heat and sweat and cool cars and starfish over nipples. A large hallelujah for the likes of glorious Coney Island.